The Cliche of the Cliched Paradox

January 8th, 2008

I’m a walking talking d/s cliche. White, forties, successful (if a little uneasy about the success) at work, well respected, well paid, but hopelessly messed up internally due to an addiction to sexual arousal that mirrors in it’s irrationality, intensity and incessant gotta-do-it / gotta-stop-it cycles, an untreated addiction to heroine.
I want to be healed. […]

tags: Porn Addiction, Submission, Perversions, Fetish author: petproject comments: No Comments

I am my obsession (obsession), my only obsession (obsession) who do I want me to be when I sleep with me.

August 31st, 2007

I’m feeling a bit weary and dull-headed as I write this but I’m in the middle of an insane weekend with Abigail. It’s indulging my appetite for extraordinary levels of extended sexual arousal grounded in bad behavior. And though I know all that - the generality about myself I am learning new specifics. Such as […]

tags: Femdom, Tease and Denial, Manipulation, Porn Addiction, Submission, Perversions, Behavior Modification, Sex Toys, Fetish, Masturbation author: petproject comments: No Comments

Intoxication, Sex Toys and Porn

April 22nd, 2007

Abigail often has these passing fetishy interests and I had expected the ‘forced intoxication’ play to grow old for her and that it would already be behind us. But it hasn’t. If anything it’s escalating. I’m not turned on by intoxication per se, but I am turned on by bad behavior, by things that […]

tags: Femdom, Manipulation, Porn Addiction, Submission, Financial Domination, Perversions, Behavior Modification, Sex Toys, Fetish author: petproject comments: No Comments

A Final Posting For Now Perhaps

December 8th, 2006

At most I slept for three hours. I awoke painfully hard. The delicious torture of cialis is that you can feel asexual and yet sport an iron hard erection which coaxes you like an evil spirit to take up once again your lubricant and begin to stroke. And so I did.
I do not know that […]

tags: Tease and Denial, Porn Addiction, Perversions, Fetish, Masturbation author: petproject comments: No Comments

Confessions of a Porn and Phone Sex Addicted Masturbator

September 1st, 2006

The following came out of my head as I was stroking today in compliance with the Empty House guideline (see Guidelines tab):
700pm
Came home to empty house. logged on. stroking. in kitchen. no lube. hard anyway.
703pm
no way to avoid stroking cos 3day weekend .. nothing that needs to be done tonight cos can be done tomorrow […]

tags: Femdom, Manipulation, Porn Addiction, Perversions, Erotic Fiction, Behavior Modification, Masturbation author: petproject comments: 1 Comment

The Urge to Stroke My Cock is Unrelenting

August 30th, 2006

The urge to stroke is consuming me. I want to talk to Abigail so I can stroke. I want to return to a home alone so I can stroke. I want to be allowed to stay up all night so I can stroke. I’d love to be required to stroke in the morning if only […]

tags: Femdom, Tease and Denial, Porn Addiction, Perversions, Behavior Modification, Masturbation author: petproject comments: 2 Comments

A Catalog of Sin

August 20th, 2006

Abigail is currently torturing me with images from the online VS catalog that she likes in the hardcopy she’s looking at. Of course she has no idea she’s torturing me, she’s just bringing me up to date on one of her interests, lingerie. I appreciate that. But my cock is enraged, demanding attention. It twitches […]

tags: Manipulation, Porn Addiction, Perversions, Behavior Modification author: petproject comments: 1 Comment